Beige Rocklathe

Beige Saddlin' Rocklathe (born during the 2nd seed, 5th moon phase) is a male pornstar, music producer, director, philosopher, and a stay at home nephew. His most notable works include the film "Good Will Hunting," the painting "The Starry Night," and portraying John Rambo in the film "Rocky."

Discovery and Early Life
Legend says, Beige was conceived somewhere inside the Helix Nebula, some 700 light-years away from the Earth. The myth is, that the Helix Nebula actually gave birth to Beige, as it is said that the Nebula spoke the words "No Homo" when it created Beige.

Beige was found in the Atlantic Ocean, roughly 2 miles off the coast of Onancock, Virginia. He was found by the American Coastguard, who immediately sent him to Area 69, for the child was abnormally sexy and had extremely pink nipples. Brad Pitt was contacted and questioned to be the father of the child, but denied the accusation. Beige was then put up for adoption by the government. Jesus Christ and Albert Einstein raised the child as their own in Texascity, Texas. He didn't go to school, as he was an all knowing entity who was incredibly handsome and had vast sums of money. He was perfect.

Teenish Years, Hannenheim, and the Tight Booty Singularity
Beige became an alcoholic and a traveling two-eyed, cyclops freak. Eventually, he left his circus act, recovered to sobriety, and moved the Hannenheim. Every day, he went to the local diner, sipped on some coffee, and contemplated his existence. He went home to his son, Lou Diamond Phillips, and his big, important business wife, Kevin Bacon. She got done with her big, important CEO job stuff about female equality and started bitching about the laundry being done. Beige was confused, as their family was nudist during the week days. She hit him with her big, important Business briefcase and knocked him out cold.

While unconcious, Beige had revelations of the near future, a Tight Booty Singularity. An ass becoming so tight, it creates a singularity that kills thousands. This vision awoke him from his sleep. He left home, kissed Lou Diamond Phillips goodbye, punched his big, important business wife in the uterus, and left home. Upon leaving home, he felt the Singularity in his midst. gay

Discography
Music Beige has produced since 2010:

Controversy
In May of 2009, Beige was caught outside of Tim Burton's home, molesting his cat. Beige was intoxicated and high on Jesus. In July of 2010, Beige was found in Central Park of New York, molesting local squirrels. In November of 2011, Beige was discovered unconcious inside Tony Romo's home, having overdosed on MVP Trophy Molestation. After his court case in 2012 for infant molestation, Beige was quoted saying, "Fresco Fre-Fresco Fresco Fre-Fresco Fresco Fre-Fresco."